Anonymous asked: Dear Colonel: Please teach me to be as smooth and suave with the ladies as you are. I am an attentive pupil and eager to learn.
How to be Smooth and Suave Like Roy Mustang in Ten Easy Steps:
Step One:
- Be dignified. Keep Calm. Don’t let anything throw you off balance. Being smooth and suave will require a certain air of dignity that women are naturally drawn to.
Step Two:
- Listen to your close friends. They may be able to perceive things that are currently not working for you, and help you improve your romantic pursuits.
Step Three:
- Show her your intellect. Women love an intelligent, thoughtful man. Having a good head on your shoulders is sexy; and reassuring for the future success of any potential relationship.
Step Four:
- Be direct, but not too forwards. It’s best to get to know a woman before you make very fast advances in any relationship.
Step Five:
- Make her feel appreciated. Never ask for something else in front of a woman!
Step Six:
- Never make a woman wait! Leaving your dates hanging is the epitome of bad manners, and is ungentlemanly. Remember to be timely, and the word will spread that you are a true gentleman.
Step Seven:
- Be Yourself. But better. At least initially, you will want to project the air of charm, confidence, and wit. The other things are meant to be revealed slowly but surely, after you have impressed her.
Step Eight:
- Charm her with flowers. Flowers can never go wrong.
Step Nine:
- React Casually and Unsurprised when she shows interest. Her flirtations are a good sign, and you should not mess it up with overreactions or awkward reactions.
Step Ten:
- When you find a woman who is right: let her know what she means to you. There’s nothing more smooth, or suave, than an honest man.
If you follow these steps, you are sure to appear to be smooth, and suave, and a real gentleman who can charm women.
oh god i can’t this is the best
